Making a wedding gift list

A wedding gift list can sometimes be a delicate subject since often the bride and groom feel awkward about compiling a list of gifts they would like to receive and whether a gift list should be incorporated into the wedding invitation is also a bit of a shadowy subject.

Not so many years ago, it used to be the bride's mother who would organise and manage the gift list, letting guests know what was on the list and ticking off items as they were bought. These days couples choose to manage their own lists and in the case of couples who have perhaps lived together first, or even lived separately and already owning all the essentials for setting up home, they may choose a honeymoon list in place of a gift list.

Many large stores and online sites operate a wedding registry service which is by far the easiest way for guests to purchase a gift for the wedding couple. Buying online takes away the hassle of shopping and wrapping the present, as well as delivering it or taking it with them to the wedding. It also makes it easier for couples to keep track of the presents that guests have given them.

Couples who already have sufficient china, crockery, pans, towels and linens, may choose to ask their guests to contribute to their honeymoon list. This is an alternative to the wedding registry and allows guests to purchase parts of the honeymoon itself. For example they could pledge a romantic dinner for two, or they could foot the bill for a pampering session. The cash could also be used towards upgrading flights or booking a tour.

Whether or not you should automatically include details of your wedding registry or honeymoon list in your invitations is entirely up to you. Guests expect and indeed want to buy a gift, and so would not be offended if you included a website or store name which is holding your registry. It also saves them having to make a phone call to ask what you would like to receive. When it comes to the evening invitations, again you might feel hesitant about including a reference to the gift list. Here, the easiest option is perhaps to include in the wording the fact that them being present to share your day is a gift to you, but should they wish to purchase a gift, you have a wedding registry in place at... and give them the name of the store or online site.